Flyover Land or Land-O-Nod

I was offended by the recent NWA debacle. While east coast and left coasters have referred to middle America as "flyover land", it was doubly disrespectful for our (formerly) own airline to not even bother to stop in Minneapolis. Flyover land indeed.
Concensus quickly grew that the pilot & co-pilot had fallen asleep. The aircraft was manned by the autopilot and the hum of engines on a mid-range flight could have lulled them to sleep. They deny this.
The piloting team claim they were distracted in a discussion over company policy. They lost situational awareness. That company policy discussion probably did not cover using laptops while on duty. That is verboten. Using their laptops is the second excuse we heard. What are we to believe? Two experienced pilots with 30,000 hrs of flight time were playing games, or reading the blogs or in a deep work related discussion?
The pilots are suspended and will probably be fired and have their licenses revoked.
The flying public will still be scarred. We cheered when Capt. Sully Sullenberger landed that plane on the Hudson river last year. People felt better when they saw gray hair on their plane's pilot. Now that confidence is eroding. The NWA pilots were in their 50's and should have known better than to get distracted or nap.

After a critical incident, management focuses on preventing a reoccurance. Maybe they can take some of my suggestions. Here they are:

Give the pilots plenty of caffeinated beverages but no key to the washroom. Try falling asleep with a full bladder.
Install a display like the one KLM uses on transatlantic flights. A simulated radar display tracks the plane on its route. If NWA had this, someone would have noticed in the cabin when it headed over Wisconsin.

Have new policy offering triple frequent flyer miles on miles when they "overfly".

Offer reduced fairs on childrens flying with a parent. Get more kids on those planes. Anyone who has traveled on a road trip with youngsters knows that they constantly ask, "Are we there yet?" Tired parents would ask the flight attendant who would notice if the plane wasn't descending or circling the airport when it should.

Gone to Pot

I got an email attachment recently with a list of things to prevent the H1N1 flu. One of the recommendations was to use the Neti pot. Do you know what that it? It is a device for nasal irrigation. People who are trying to clear up infections or decrease virus or bacteria counts use them. The package on the above picture says to use it for daily nasal hygiene.
It looks like self-inflicted water boarding.
Some people swear by the Neti Pot. I have a phobia about drowning and will chose to suffer the flu or get the immunization if it is ever available. No pouring water up my nose for me. I have had two near drowning experiences in my life and cringe at the idea of this treatment. Even if I could tolerate it, I would put using it in the same category as being obsessed with colon cleansing. Noses are supposed to have mucus and colons.. well, you know.
Former VP Dick Cheney is writing his memoirs. Maybe he could defend his involvment with water boarding by claiming it was a public health measure.

Hopping Down the Funny Trail

One of the morning "news" shows just had a guest touting kangaroo meat. The catch line (not exact quote, but close); everytime a prius owner drives to the market to buy meat it cancels out the savings in emissions.... was a grabber. Not that I have a Prius. Not that I am that worried, but what ???
His point? Ruminants produce methane gas. I don't think he blamed cows specifically but we knew what he meant. Maybe he learned the "Oprah lesson". Don't disparage beef on national TV. Remember her lawsuit in Texas a decade ago? She did a show about unsafe beef and it didn't go down well with beefraisers. Apparently it is safer to blame ruminants.

http://www.cnn.com/US/9801/21/oprah.beef/

Gas. We blame the cows for producing methane clouds. Surprisingly the food police haven't come after people who burp in public---yet. One must tred lightly here. Wouldn't we need a Gas Czar and who would want that job? Would it be a gas tax or a fine?

In Minnesota we are serious about protecting the pork industry. We grow pigs like Texas grows steers. When we found pigs with H1N1 they blamed people for passing it to the pigs.

If you buy that ruminants are causing global warming and oinkers and birds carry flu we might want to do what the guy on Good Morning America suggests and eat kangaroo meat. It is probably another import and eating food grown closer to home is fashionable.
Does that mean we would have to build kangaroo feedlots in Kansas or have roos grazing on the range?
What would you call the guys on horses who round them up?
How high would the fences have to be?
Would they put up signs like the deer crossing signs that warn motorists?
Wouldn't those slaughterhouses be interesting with all that hopping and kicking. A kangaroo can take you out with its' tail.
Wouldn't truckdrivers get hazard pay for transporting a live load of kangaroos?

I think I'll stick to beef and pork. I may even drive to the store for my purchase.

Three Who Contracted Swine Flu May Have Been Killed

Three pigs. Three pigs who didn't live in brick houses and may now have been been sent to the slaughterhouse. These three pigs may have contracted "swine flu" from the teenage 4Hrs who got sick at our state fair inn August. The pigs got the swine flu from the kids. They deduced this from results of swabbing pig snouts at the fair. No pigs complained of symptoms at the time. None went to the fair nurse. There may have been a few wet noses but no one noticed pigs sneezing or coughing. We were reassured that there was no danger visiting the animal exhibits at the fair.

Note when this news was released---yesterday. It is important not to scare people away from attending the state fair or eating pork. Don't those tests come back sooner than that ? The kids tests came back faster. These same people are still reassuring us that it is safe to eat pork. Not to worry and I don't. The flu virus doesn't migrate to the muscle / meat. We cook pork thoroughly. The virus stays in the pigs' lungs. This may not be reassuring to the Chinese who might have cooked some of those lungs in their "hot pots". Ask my son Andy and nephew Peter who were probably served lung while on China visits.

What Does That Birth Certificate Say? -or- Salsa Dancing With the Stars

They are called the "birthers" and they ardently believe that the president is not qualified to have been elected president because he was born in Kenya. Other GOP voices disavow this , claiming there are other things to worry about like how are we ever going to pay back the gazillions we are spending.

While I did accept as fact that Barach was born in Hawaii in the past, I am now having second thoughts. New evidence has been shown that raises questions. Did you see the video of him dancing with the "hot" Latina singer at the White House concert?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jFzbooqaDjc&feature=related

He may be a Mexican. Since many Mexicans sneak across the border to give birth in the USA he might even have a valid birth certificate.

Being Hispanic would explain a lot. It makes more sense than his being a closet Black Muslim. It would explain why his wife and girls don't wear burqas and why he drinks beer in the Rose Garden. (Muslims don't drink alcohol.) It would explain why he has visited many other nations but not China. China has been known to quarantine Mexicans to stop the spread of Swine Flu.

Hispanics are rapidly approaching majority status. They may have voted him in. They probably like the Salsa dancing. Barach Obama may be in good standing with the Hispanic population after the dance but some aren't so sure how Michelle felt. Was that a cold shoulder? At least he didn't pat Thalia on the backside like Bill (the ex- president ) might have done.

What Does That Birth Certificate Say?

Generations

I heard on the radio this am that it is Chris Wallaces' birthday. He is 62. One is eligible for early retirement from SS at 62. It would be hard to retire when you dad, Mike Wallace, is still gainfully employed. Bet Chris keeps doing the Fox programs. I always thought of him as the kid. Sure dates me.