NEVER CRY WOLF or HERE WOLFIE, WOLFIE, NICE WOLFIE...

Last night on the local news there was a story about deer causing a lot of accidents. Sources said three thousand deer were killed annually on state roads. I remember one Wisconsinite I worked with who had had nine encounters with deer while in her car. The insurance rates in her county were high due to the number of deer/car collisiions.

Help is on the way. The reporter mentioned technology having something you could put on your car that would signal the deer --car approaching. I think one variant of this has been around for years and doesn't work well. Maybe they have improved it. They stated the other thing that repels deer is wolf urine! Then they showed a wolf and a yellow puddle. All this was during the dinner hour news. Not a good time to watch TV and eat I thought. Do we 'mark' the cars or the road? I think we are going to need a bigger wolf pack in Minnesota.

How would we collect the urine? Wolves are wild and there are a lot of roads and cars in this state. Did you ever see the movie "Never Cry Wolf"? Maybe a contest like that would be more practical. Mark your own.

Last April our local paper's Bulletin Board asked for writers to submit original Berma Shave verses. This is one of the ones I sent that they printed.

WILDLIFE CROSSING

SIGNS PLEASE HEED

DEER IN THESE WOODS

CANNOT READ

BERMA SHAVE !

PS. Day 16. Meeting a friend I used to work with for exercise. Still hanging in there.

ANOTHER LAP AROUND THE TRACK...GO,GO,GO

This isn’t about exercise. I heard a segment on the radio this am about Life Coaches. Apparently this is an unregulated, unlicenced occupation. The host said some charge $100 -$200 an hour for their services. One organization requires some education and an online test. They also scrutinize one taped coaching session for the techniques used. It appears anyone can be a Life Coach if they can sell themselves and their services. There probably are many effective and wonderful people doing this. Aren’t you a little tempted yourself to furnish an office and hang out and shingle and start billing $200 / hr.? One of my son’s friend’s mother is pursuing this career. She is a successful lawyer, actually head of a large law firm. I wonder how much an hour she plans to bill. More than as a lawyer?

Jay Leno had a funny comment on Life Coaches. He mused, “Isn’t that what friends are for?” I think so, or at least mothers. Everybody get a grip here, can't we trust our own instincts? Pay for a Life Coach?

I am not against paying someone for counseling or therapy. There are situations where this is appropriate. There are professional psychologists and chaplains etc. who are very helpful to people in need. Maybe the rest of us could just stay on course using that time tested book left to us. Our previous pastor and his wife used the Proverbs to train their children. One chapter each day after dinner. Good practical wisdom for living. There are 30 chapters so it fit most months. As far as I can tell, their kids have turned out pretty well.

PS Day 15. -10 and did 10 laps.

CRAZY CATS

The fluffy white cat is Nissa. Sammy is the black cat with the stole. The light brown cat looking guilty ( like a mug shot ) is Wicket. Daughter Mary and husband Mike live at their house.

We had barn cats when I was a kid on the farm. My sister remembers one named Balogney Sausage. I remember Kitty. I think we dragged those cats around a lot. As an adult I developed an mild allergy to cats. Can't drag them around anymore and we don't have one. I do enjoy our "grandcats". Sammy, Mary's black cat greets you at the door with hello. Mike's Persian cats have gotten to know me and like being petted. They hid from me initially. Dan's black cat is playful. When I babysat at their house a week last summer the cat delighted in pouncing on me while I was sleeping. That elicitated a shreek from me. The cat had more fun than I did.

The cats we had while growing up just caught mice. There are more talented cats out there. Watch the videos if you want a good laugh. Laughing is good for you. there are 3 videos

link:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iV6DQuEh4UQ&mode=related&search=

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WofFb_eOxxA

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pIqhUCZgwXQ&mode=related&search=

PS Day 14. Training time. OK on Sunday but too much salt!

PLUMB(ING) CRAZY

Last Saturday we had lunch with Jon's cousin Linda. Good chance to catch up on family news and enjoy her company. She had heard about a newer restaurant here from a friend of hers. We hadn't been there before and decided to try this Main Street wine bar.

The ambiance was great. Lunch was so-so. Jon hated his dish. We lingered after dinner talking about future travel plans and our lives. Jon excused himself briefly. When he came back he said something like, "you've got to see the bathroom sink". I said we might not have the same plumbing in the ladies room. Not to worry he told us. Now I was concerned. Was he snooping in the ladies room too? Time to see for myself.

I found out he had not been in the ladies room. There was a unisex wash up area. Picture this, a black countertop with faucets on either end. No sink to catch the water, just a faucet over the counter. Of course I tried it. The water puddled briefly under the outlet then drained backwards toward the wall into a slit I hadn't noticed. Clever.

We saw a lot of clever Euro plumbing on our recent trip. Faucets with sensors are common now but we saw a lot of variations of these. Had one hotel with nifty lighting in the mirror that was not visible with the lights off. Also have a pretty good two-button flushing system. Figured out ourselves --big button for one job, small button for less water to flush. Europeans are very eco-conscious. Our favorite plumbing experience was what Jon called the "sheetzerator". Forgive me. It was attacked to the toilet and did a grinding thing like a garbage disposer if you pressed the "big button". Engineering marvel or crude device. You be the judge.

Day 12: Can't walk in field house on Saturday and it is cold and snowy. I'm doing a little penance today. Ate too much bread yesterday even if it was good whole grain stuff. Keep on keeping on. Jane

Watch Out For Those Bullets in the Medical Bulletins, Might Be Dangerous to Your Health

On the news last evening I learned some study says if you take more than thirty minutes to fall asleep you are have double or tripled the risk of death. I am not sure that was helpful to insomniacs who now can ponder that while tossing and turning.

I do not have much faith in medical bulletins because they frequently contradict each other. Cardiologists advise a glass of red wine a day. Other health officials consider 7 drinks a week excessive. Got to protect that liver. A few years ago one report stated that underweight people were at a higher risk of dying sooner. A bit before that someone's study showed that significantly reducing caloric intake could lead to a longer lifespan. What to do. What to do. That is why I usually cut a path down the middle, in my thinking anyway. My behaviour does not always follow my thinking, but I am working on that.

I take more than 30 minutes to fall asleep most nights. Lunesta commercials are aimed at me. Either I can't fall asleep or stay asleep even in my decaffeinated state. Trouble is, I hate the way you feel the next morning if you take a "sleep aide". I guess I will just have to live with the knowledge I have 100% chance of doing you know what someday. Today I feel fine. Perhaps I could get a research grant to study how long people live who ignore medical bulletins.

PS Day 11. Walked this am. Had a good day yesterday. Still hanging in there. Jane

I'M JUST DOING THE RAY GUN DANCE

STAR WARS REDUX ?

Newspaper reports of the military’s new “Nonlethal Ray Gun” caught my attention this morning. The ray gun (developed by Raytheon) shoots a beam that briefly heats the skin to 130 degrees. The receiver feels very uncomfortable or “as if they are about to catch fire” according to the Associated Press article. Apparently the military hopes this would be enough to make your opponent drop their weapon.

Things to consider before spending a bazillion defence dollars:

1. This has already been tried by Marvin the Martian fifty+ years ago. In spite of his ray gun he could not defeat Daffy Duck or Bugs Bunny in those Looney Tunes escapades.

2. Older females who have experienced menopause would be immune. We have hit 130 degrees frequently. My glasses would steam. Really. At least in my experience, this flash of heat never rendered me passive. Quite the opposite. I might have gone right for the enemies throat if they zapped me.

3. It wouldn’t work against Iraqi insurgents. They are already living in a climate that has 130 degree summers. Ask any soldier who has been in Iraq how hot that macadam is in the summer. Some of the local population still go barefoot on the asphalt.

4, It would probably make the international community nervous. Remember how the Star Wars program was received? Remember the Neutron Bomb? Could we get the remaining two Pointer Sisters to do a little song and dance about the new Ray Gun?

5. Sounds like it would contribute to further global warming.

In support of developing and outfitting our troops with massive

Ray Guns consider the following:

1. It couldn’t be a worse idea than allowing Tazer guns to be sold to the public. How do you feel about every bad guy—rapist, mugger etc having that in their arsenal?

2. I like the idea of a new song by the Pointer Sisters about a Ray Gun.

3. It would give us a step up in our defending ourselves against Aliens. The people in Roswell, New Mexico would understand. Think the movie “Independence Day”. We would be ready.

4. Remember this is a proposed non-lethal weapon. Mothers Against Military Madness would endorse it. I’m not sure how the NRA would feel but then I don’t care what the NRA says.

5 . I think Ronnie would like it.

PS. Day 10. I am still in the army. No AWOL. Walking laps like a rat in a maze is getting easier and faster. I also got a very good offer from Curves. 30% off and one free month. Want to start 1st of Feb. Keep good thoughts coming my way.

ONE OF LIFE'S SIMPLE PLEASURES

A cup of hot coffee, a comfortable chair, and the morning newspaper are one of life's simple pleasures for me. This past year I have also regularly submitted anecdotes to the Pioneer Press Bulletin Board. Most of the contributors are persons of my demographic. We have similar histories and memories and there are ongoing comments on each other's stories. I have to admit it makes my day when they print something I have sent them.

Yesterday I read my daughter's Mary's blog and I am piggybacking off her topic. She had my granddaughter Mina overnight this past weekend. They went shopping and Mary let Mina pick out her own birthday present. She is a Barbie fan and picked a set called "Barbie and Tanner". Tanner is a dog who resembles Mina's real life lab Bailey. I laughed when I read the description of Barbie and Tanners interactive play. Barbie feeds Tanner dog biscuits. He opens his mouth and lifts his tail and poops! Barbie then picks up the stuff with her magnetic wand and puts it in the recepticle and on and on... How could I resist commenting on this?

link to BB:http://www.twincities.com/mld/pioneerpress/living/people/16529039.htm